I'm having a hard time right now. I'm really glad I didn't end up becoming a local news producer or reporter, although that puts me at a loss for career choices. I decided I can't handle all the murder, death and sad stories anymore. Graphics are one thing, but right now it's really hard for me to hear any of these sad freaking stories, because of my personal experience right now. I still want to be a tech reporter, but I'm not going to do any local news.
You'll see my plan soon.
Showing posts with label moving forward. Show all posts
Showing posts with label moving forward. Show all posts
Wednesday, October 18, 2006
Sunday, September 24, 2006
On the edge...
So I've been on the edge of a lot of things lately. My emotions have been on the edge, I'm on the edge of going crazy, and sometimes my posts are on the edge of making sense (like this and the prior post.) Now for some clarity into my life, and what I'm doing.
I'm switching TV stations as of Monday. I'm no longer in the KSL Blue... now I've moved over to the red side and joined KUTV. I'm still a graphic artist, but I think that's really something I can excell in, without having to advance my career as much. Do I think it'll be useful for my career? Perhaps... but in the long run the real reason I took the job was the cash and the stability. KSL was an awesome place to work, and I'd recommend it to anyone in Utah. It's a great place with a ton of great folks, and if you're really interested in seeing people who care about their jobs, head there. The opportunity with KUTV leaves a lot of unknowns in front of me, but with a lot of answers in the near term. I know that after a few weeks, I'll love it, and hopefully they'll love me!
On the edge of Healthcare is something I'm really excited to be near. I've got to make all my benefits decisions within the next few weeks, and realistically that makes me stoked. I'm doing the 401k thing, the benefits thing and maybe i'll try to get some brain health in there too.
I'm also on the edge of having my life be great. Right now, it's going ok. I'm the only person who can make it be great, and I'm finding that pretty difficult right now. It's still hard (really hard) for me to go through all this stuff with my brother. He was someone who I used as a blueprint for my own life, and it's hard for me to deal with it. It's hard for me to watch UFC fights, although it's somewhat thereputic as well. It's really hard for me to visit my brother's family... because they all mean so much to me, and when they say things like "you look like daddy" or anything that deals with the "D" word, I about lose my mind and start bawling. I can't really deal with this world right now, and it drives me crazy.
I'm on the edge of a lot of things, and while I've been on the edge of something that starts with S, I don't think it's really an option for me. I've been dealing with so much lately, when it gets late at night, I get pretty sad still. I think I'm bi-polar, and if someone could help me treat it effectively without making me feel all crappy and tired, I'd be pretty stoked.
PS-- Going to vegas next saturday for the UNLV game. Not the biggest vegas fan, but frequent flier miles! =) I've got enough for a trip for myself already. Anyone know how to spend frequent flier miles on things other than flights?
I'm switching TV stations as of Monday. I'm no longer in the KSL Blue... now I've moved over to the red side and joined KUTV. I'm still a graphic artist, but I think that's really something I can excell in, without having to advance my career as much. Do I think it'll be useful for my career? Perhaps... but in the long run the real reason I took the job was the cash and the stability. KSL was an awesome place to work, and I'd recommend it to anyone in Utah. It's a great place with a ton of great folks, and if you're really interested in seeing people who care about their jobs, head there. The opportunity with KUTV leaves a lot of unknowns in front of me, but with a lot of answers in the near term. I know that after a few weeks, I'll love it, and hopefully they'll love me!
On the edge of Healthcare is something I'm really excited to be near. I've got to make all my benefits decisions within the next few weeks, and realistically that makes me stoked. I'm doing the 401k thing, the benefits thing and maybe i'll try to get some brain health in there too.
I'm also on the edge of having my life be great. Right now, it's going ok. I'm the only person who can make it be great, and I'm finding that pretty difficult right now. It's still hard (really hard) for me to go through all this stuff with my brother. He was someone who I used as a blueprint for my own life, and it's hard for me to deal with it. It's hard for me to watch UFC fights, although it's somewhat thereputic as well. It's really hard for me to visit my brother's family... because they all mean so much to me, and when they say things like "you look like daddy" or anything that deals with the "D" word, I about lose my mind and start bawling. I can't really deal with this world right now, and it drives me crazy.
I'm on the edge of a lot of things, and while I've been on the edge of something that starts with S, I don't think it's really an option for me. I've been dealing with so much lately, when it gets late at night, I get pretty sad still. I think I'm bi-polar, and if someone could help me treat it effectively without making me feel all crappy and tired, I'd be pretty stoked.
PS-- Going to vegas next saturday for the UNLV game. Not the biggest vegas fan, but frequent flier miles! =) I've got enough for a trip for myself already. Anyone know how to spend frequent flier miles on things other than flights?
Thursday, September 14, 2006
Happy? Nah... Sad? Definetely not.
I get a lot of people checking in on me, wondering exactly "how I'm doing..." or "hey, heard you had a seizure, hope you don't die!" I'm here to clear up exactly how I'm doing.
I'm Ehh. When I say Ehh, it's not "I'm doing bad, investigate further" but it's also not "Holy crap, I just moved to New York, my life feels perfect!" It's exactly what it sounds like. Yeah, my brother died a few months back. I'm still not really over it. I've got a lot of emotional issues to work out... and PS, I'm concerned about my family. I recently moved back from New York to live with my sister so we could be a support structure for each other. I was very concerned from afar about how my family was doing, and I decided its most prudent for me to be back in Utah. Utah isn't working out that well yet either, between the low pay, under appreciated feeling, job switcheroo and udder lack of health benefits, I'm not that happy to be here.
Honesty isn't necessarily what people are looking for when they check up on me, and when they show concern, it almost makes me want to lie to some extent. I don't know how anyone can help me, I don't know what you personally can do for me, but the fact that you care about me enough to call is enough. Know that when I respond "I feel really crappy today," you replying with "well, regardless of how you're doing, I still love you and care about how you're doing daily. I know things can be grey, but they'll look up," is a good answer, as long as its sincere. Sincerety is all I desire. I don't need someone to fix my problems. They're not going to be fixed easily. You caring about me though, will go a long way. Probably a longer way than you think.
Big ups to people who care about me. It really means a lot to me. If you read this blog and haven't emailed in a while, hit me up. I've got a real easy email address... it's yourname@randallatnyc.com . Email me, ping me, call me and say hi. I want to know how you're doing.
[completely unrelated]
Oh, and this just came across my RSS reader: Nintendo Wii launches November 15th for $250. I wish I had some cash. Maybe i'll save some money.
I'm Ehh. When I say Ehh, it's not "I'm doing bad, investigate further" but it's also not "Holy crap, I just moved to New York, my life feels perfect!" It's exactly what it sounds like. Yeah, my brother died a few months back. I'm still not really over it. I've got a lot of emotional issues to work out... and PS, I'm concerned about my family. I recently moved back from New York to live with my sister so we could be a support structure for each other. I was very concerned from afar about how my family was doing, and I decided its most prudent for me to be back in Utah. Utah isn't working out that well yet either, between the low pay, under appreciated feeling, job switcheroo and udder lack of health benefits, I'm not that happy to be here.
Honesty isn't necessarily what people are looking for when they check up on me, and when they show concern, it almost makes me want to lie to some extent. I don't know how anyone can help me, I don't know what you personally can do for me, but the fact that you care about me enough to call is enough. Know that when I respond "I feel really crappy today," you replying with "well, regardless of how you're doing, I still love you and care about how you're doing daily. I know things can be grey, but they'll look up," is a good answer, as long as its sincere. Sincerety is all I desire. I don't need someone to fix my problems. They're not going to be fixed easily. You caring about me though, will go a long way. Probably a longer way than you think.
Big ups to people who care about me. It really means a lot to me. If you read this blog and haven't emailed in a while, hit me up. I've got a real easy email address... it's yourname@randallatnyc.com . Email me, ping me, call me and say hi. I want to know how you're doing.
[completely unrelated]
Oh, and this just came across my RSS reader: Nintendo Wii launches November 15th for $250. I wish I had some cash. Maybe i'll save some money.
Monday, August 21, 2006
Cars.
2005 Chevrolet Malibu Base 4D Sedan White 34,346
2004 Mitsubishi Lancer Evo 4D Sedan Silver 31,847
2001 Mitsubishi Eclipse Spyder GT 2D Convertible Black 67,023
2004 Pontiac Sunfire SE 2D Coupe Gold 2D 18,584
2003 Mitsubishi Eclipse GS 2D Coupe Silver 53,645
2004 Mitsubishi Lancer ES 4D Sedan Silver 35,135
2004 Dodge Neon SXT 4D Sedan Red 43,206
2005 Chevrolet Cavalier Base 4D Sedan Blue 53,467
2004 Dodge Neon SE 4D Sedan Silver 46,568
2003 Oldsmobile Alero GL 4D Sedan Silver 36,304
2002 Mitsubishi Diamante VR-X 4D Sedan Black 47,883
Blah. Buying cars isn't a very fun activity, but I sure am glad I can buy from an auto auction. I'm expecting to spend no more than $9,500 total including tax, licensing, etc.
Good times!!! I am excited.
2004 Mitsubishi Lancer Evo 4D Sedan Silver 31,847
2001 Mitsubishi Eclipse Spyder GT 2D Convertible Black 67,023
2004 Pontiac Sunfire SE 2D Coupe Gold 2D 18,584
2003 Mitsubishi Eclipse GS 2D Coupe Silver 53,645
2004 Mitsubishi Lancer ES 4D Sedan Silver 35,135
2004 Dodge Neon SXT 4D Sedan Red 43,206
2005 Chevrolet Cavalier Base 4D Sedan Blue 53,467
2004 Dodge Neon SE 4D Sedan Silver 46,568
2003 Oldsmobile Alero GL 4D Sedan Silver 36,304
2002 Mitsubishi Diamante VR-X 4D Sedan Black 47,883
Blah. Buying cars isn't a very fun activity, but I sure am glad I can buy from an auto auction. I'm expecting to spend no more than $9,500 total including tax, licensing, etc.
Good times!!! I am excited.
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